Thursday, March 23, 2006

The Next NFL Commissioner

First of all, where does this Condoleezza Rice rumor come from? Going from negotiating with Koffi Annan and Kim Jong-Il to dealing with Drew Rosenhaus and Al Davis looks like a step down. Now that Rice denied the NFL, the derby is wide open. Of course with the proper publicity and TV coverage, Jerry Rice may put his name in the hat.

10. Isaiah Thomas-Oops wrong list.

9. Joe Namath-First order of business: Getting that kiss from Suzy Kolber

8. Don Zimmer-He’s just so darn cute. He could get an Army helmet with the NFL logo.

7. Reggie Fowler-According to his resume, it would be his second stint as commissioner.

6. Flavor Flav-The Texans are now on the clock boyeee!

5. Vince McMahon-What’s that? He already tried his hand as football executive? How did it turn anyway?

4. Jerome Bettis-His parents would keep him from becoming drunk with power.

3. Deacon Jones-Trouble with Jerry Jones or Daniel Snyder is solved with a head slap.

2. John Madden-What you’ve got here is Boom! Labor negotiations! Plus the Madden Cruiser doubles as comissioner's mobile office.

1. Bono-Forget AIDS in Africa. Someone needs to address the ambiguity of Transition Player contracts. Help us Bono-Wan you're our only hope.